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>>Well when I say self identity I mean self identifi...

Yes, it is a matter largely within your control, usually you choose your own affiliations and identifications, with only few minor exceptions.  

I am small and fragile, maybe something my parents gave me, and there is only so much I can do, but everything else beyond my physical characters is up to me to decide. Yet, regardless of what I do, I wouldn't have a big black cock (my race isn't meant for this), but gladly I am never jealous of those for having it. I am happy the way I am,
and I prefer to spend more time into spiritual thinking and personal characters, and build my own identities with the elements aspiring to me


But of course, many are too dumb to see this. (my previous supervisor was too ignorant coming to this and he stepped on the landmine, I suppose)